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One thing that makes some sense, but I don’t know what it would stand for would an “avatar’s HALO”
Heavenly
Avatar
Link
Operator??
Heaven
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Link
Originator??
HALOS
Heaven
Avatar
Link
Operation
System/Service???
HALOEHeaven
Avatar
Link
Operation
EngineReally need a now beginning with O that will work.
[quote=Iume;5619]That would have to be at least three hundred thousand years.[/quote]
Just going to eliminate this line and leave it a other phoenix cycles. It doesn’t even make sense that he would be going 300,000 years if gods are only a hundred or so centuries for cycles.
Author error…
I need to have a better record keeping system.
I have all this stuff in Excel, like cast list, etc etc. However, I also need to expand the “world list”
Between keeping track of what different groups are, what different suns are called etc it is getting difficult to manage.
I started working on a writing program to track all this sort of stuff, as well as write the book, and eventually be able to synch with a web version for Beta Readers to interact with, but like so many programs I come up with, I ran out of time and had to 1) write this book and 2) do work that paid the bills in the meantime.
[quote=Iume;5526]The way the subject of the sentence is setup it implies that Logoi is the only to show to wedding and the only one to put her away when you meant Orcus.[/quote]
Is this better?
“Orcus’ uncle.” Phaestus nodded. “Only one of my sister’s kids I ever liked. Well, Logoi is a decent kid, most of the time. Orcus was the only of children to show up at her wedding—and agree to put her away when it became necessary.
I actually went back and forth on whether I was including Orcus and Logoi at the wedding and putting her away vs just Orcus.
So, yeah, very confusing.
[quote=GameGraphix;5555]Tiernon’s crew investigated the mana theft and determined how it was done – then changed the setup so it couldn’t be done again….so how can Tom use the same method to steal EM back and steal mana again????[/quote]
Argh…crap…need to look into this….
Well, to the last point first.
Antefalken didn’t say they were from any particular plane; he said they are from the other end of the multiverse. Whatever that is.
They are actually plane independent agents in a very VERY Michael Moorcock sense of the word. (recalling that he invented the word ‘multiverse’)
I actually envisioned them for some short stories about the same time I started Book 1 and they were very Eternal Champion inspired and tied to “Chaos” which I haven’t applied that much to this storyverse, yet. (it’s a very big multiverse).
With Antimus and the darkness of the dagger we are seeing “Light vs Dark”, absolute “Good vs Evil” in some sense; to a world where good and evil are normally very subjective and extremely relative. Introducing the KofC gives an entry point to Law vs Anarchy; Order vs Chaos which are also polarized states, like the light vs dark polarization.
So anyway they are (in this storyverse) interdimensional mercenaries/agents and operate along rules very similar to demons. Just as demons can adapt to different rules, so can the KofC.
If I were to go “modern” think of them as multi-dimensional RAC Agents (albeit on the side of Chaos, not Law) ala SyFy’s the Killjoys. And not at all human. They are personifications of Anarchy, Destruction, Change and in large part this is why demon lords would only use them sparingly, you don’t want to upset the balance too much. KofC’s like to upset the balance; disrupt order, seed Chaos.
—
So…maybe I can figure some way to feed this sort of knowledge into the book sooner. Possibly with Lillith a Lillith hiring them scene…make it clear they are a very two edged sword, as dangerous for her to use as for Tom to be the brunt of.
Hmm, for example one thing I have not been clear on is how did so many D’Orcs get permanently wiped out at Etterdam? Perhaps some KofC?
Book 3 could end up being overstuffed with action scenes…unless things take long enough to make it to book 4…
Hi,
I am supposed to get Book II back from the editor at the end of the week. We therefore need to have a name for Book III at the end.
I have narrowed down the list; eliminating a few that I just didn’t think would work.
Please vote, for one and one thing only.
If you don’t like any of them, choose “None of the above” and I’ll go back to the drawing board and just pick something else not on the list. No idea what, but I’ll figure it out.
T-A-G
Hah!
Well put! =d>
Actually, Tom’s introspective moments of him curling up in a ball was what I was feeling ‘in character as Tom’ imaging myself in so far over my head that I just wanted to crawl up into a fetal ball and wish the world away.
It’s like “I can’t deal with this shit! Make it go away!”
But at the same time, that crazy stuff is so much more exciting than sitting around bored to death in a cave, or being a slave to Lenamare. It is power! It is being active. But at the same time, you know (or feel) you are a fraud and at some point the whole thing is going to blow up in your face. And you dread when that’s going to happen, because you know it’s got to…
So here is my problem then Rosver.
You were in the beta reader program. All you did was complain about how useless and boring the parts you didn’t like were.
I got very little from you in terms of what you did wantd to see, only what you didn’t want to see. [b]When you gave me specific examples[/b] [i]I tried to work to correct those,[/i] sometimes, I could, sometimes I could not. But, really, you gave me very little in the way of corrective advice, just complaints about what you didn’t like with no good strong suggestions for fixing them or improving the story.
I practically begged you for ways to make it better, so you liked it more. But got silence.
And as far as the straw man, well, maybe it’s the difference in languages, but to me, it sounds like you are calling everything you don’t like, stupid, useless, pointless and boring. That’s the message you are telling me. You don’t tell me why, or how to improve it, you just complain.
Clearly Rosver, you are very bright, very analytical and [i][b]I listen to you[/b][/i]. And you had a HUGE opportunity to shape the book in the beta program, and you chose not to do so. You just complained about the lame crap you didn’t like without giving me sufficient feedback to work with.
One thing that annoyed me in your goodreads review is that you brought up complaints there that you never brought up in the beta session. I consider that a breach of beta reading protocol. You should have brought all the complaints up. If I didn’t address them, or I did things without giving you a chance to weigh in, then complain about them in your review. But don’t bring up new stuff after the fact.
So, given all the attention I paid to you, and the opportunity you had. You have some responsibility for not getting what you wanted. That’s why I have the beta program. True, I won’t be able to even satisfy all the beta readers, but it’s an opportunity to build consensus around the things I can change/fix/improve and still keep the story on track.
Here’s a suggestion, anyone can write, anyone can publish on Amazon or Smashwords. Why don’t you try writing a book that you like and putting it out there? Then get feedback and complaints and try to deal with it to make your story better.
I think that will give you a lot of perspective and help you improve your analytical skills and the advice you give. Because, yes, I do want to hear what you have to say, but I need you to give it to me in an actionable manner.
Well that’s a very interesting possibility that I want to explore.
Much like gravity affects the flow of time.
On a large scale, I have to suspect that the topology of the multiverse might affect time, even as the curvature of space time affects time in our single universe.
E.g. Interstellar and it’s black hole and wormholes.
My guess is that things within a given localverse have the same time flow (albeit different length of days depending on the planet) but that really far out planes might have a different time flow.
The thought that magic, or mana or animus or something might also affect time, the same way mass does, is quite interesting to me.
Beta 2 Status Update
So I said this week, but it will be next week for Beta 2.
I’ve got what I hope is some major adrenaline coming.
I’ve been going through, trimming, tightening, editing, injecting more detail that should make things later clearer. Added some more Tom, Rupert, Talarius earlier and will be continuing to work on that. I’ve introduced a few sort of new characters, in that they’ve been mentioned or you have seen/heard of them but now they are active sooner than planned, and one of them in particular is pushing things on the ground in Freehold and will play a big role in the hook at the end.
The other one is a longer term major player that has been missing from the scene so far. He/She is no longer missing, but may not be obvious to all immediately (or maybe will be)
I am also lining up some battles of very large proportion that I think make good sense for the story and the plot and help fix issues that people have brought about. The difficulty has been making them fit into the existing plot and overall story and not be gratuitous. I think I’ve got that taken care of. I hope.
In particular, I think some of these battles will showcase characters that have been under served in both books and particularly in book 2.
So, luckily I am working on stuff that should (I hope) address some of these last points
I am actually adding in more Rod stuff that I had cut before Beta 1 (actually they were notes of stuff not written) that will make the beggar stuff more relevant. It also compromises Hilda’s secrets and puts aspect of the church on to her.
I have also upgraded/moved up another character tied to Talarius and the Rod. This character is going to make life more hellish for Iskerus, Barabus, Hilda. It will probably impact Lenamare along the lines of previous suggestions from Rosver (you want the Rod after Lenamare? Well this isn’t exactly the Rod–but close to it)
I know I really need to up the Exador/Ramses/Bess plotline. Bess has her own plotline and that ties out to her friends and to Reggie and Hephaestus of course.
I know that the ball is seriously dropped in terms of the Council and Exador etal.
Of course, it is only dropped in the context of a book that covers 10 days. Councils like the Council of Wizardry are like businesses, or any group of people that have to make difficult decisions on what they feel is too little information. Trust me, I have sat through a LOT of meetings like theirs. People in such positions love to put off such things as long and as much as possible. So, technically it’s very realistic…however why start now with realism?
The Djinns are another group that are just now coming into play. Most people know nothing about them. That’s how they keep such a low profile, they watch and observe. They hate Exador, they hate Ramses to a lesser extent. They were big allies of Orcus, they also dislike Lilith and Tiernon and all “false gods”
Basically, what you are seeing here, clumsily, are the foundations of coalition building.
Yeah, actually several awkwardness in this one I missed.
Here is the new section
[quote]Arch-Diocate Iskerus was in shock as was Arch-Vicar General Barabus. Barabus was staring at the spot where a flaming hole in the ground had opened up and swallowed the greatest knight of Tiernon into the Abyss. The only thing Barabus appeared capable of doing was to blink repeatedly.
Arch-Diocate Iskerus, on the other hand, was staring at a point a few feet away, where a Holy, albeit very dark, artifact of his god had been, apparently, repurposed. He reached down to hold his hand over it, feeling its aura. He had only ever examined the dagger once before and even though he had sensed his god’s presence in it, the darkness in it had terrified him. Now that darkness was gone, and in fact, he felt the normal radiance of a healing artifact of Tiernon. It was as if the blade had been reversed.
Reversed by a demon. A demon! Iskerus shuddered all the way down to the roots of his soul. How could this be? It was not possible. His mind boggled. He felt a gentle touch on his shoulder; a priest, he could not remember the man’s name.
“Arch-Diocate, what should we do with the high priests who have collapsed, and Verigas?” Someone asked.
“Take them to a quarantine tent; give them all the healing we safely can, but ensure every precaution is taken; apply every purification you can find or imagine to them. I’ll provide more instructions later.”
“And the Rod members who were also possessed?” The same someone asked Iskerus
“The same, different tent; disarm them, remove their armor and station guards.” Barabus said walking over. The Vicar General extended his hand to Iskerus.
Iskerus took it, getting up slowly, suddenly feeling far older than his current age.
“Any thoughts?” Barabus asked as he led the Arch-Diocate back to his tent. The Arch-Diocate gestured for a nearby high priest to secure the dagger.
“Not yet. I’m numb.” That was the only word Iskarus could come up with.
“As am I, but I’m slowly waking, we need to put on a very brave face for the troops, and the junior priests. A lot of faith has been shaken today; we must work to restore it.” Iskerus nodded in agreement. “For now, we must put aside our own doubts, fears, insecurities and not think too deeply upon our own questions. We must think of the souls in our care.”
“Agreed. So which of us gets to report this to the Supreme Temple?” Iskerus asked.
Barabus chuckled, “I hope that’s as far as this goes; I pray, but I am not convinced.”[/quote]
