Beta – Some Things and opinions
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[quote=The Author Guy;5593]I’m just not sure I want to do the Vaselle Teragdor conversation at this point because I am afraid it would get lost in the battle, meaning not as appreciated by everyone, myself included.[/quote]
The pacing is good. Don’t add anything. Word tweak sure, but you have a good set of progress and reversals going.
So his connection to Tom is really just going for longer with mana. Its certainly interesting, though I did expect being a warlock to confer some innate ability just in case he cant get a spell off or something
[quote=Iume;6185]Besides the current enchantress is younger than Orcus’s death. [/quote]
Not sure if that is the case….she did mention that it was before she joined the Grove…..that does not stop her from having another life & job before the Grove…..who know how long she was kicking around the multiverse before working for the Grove
2 things ive been thinking about
1.
I think we need to punch up hilda response to the revelations during the nysegard meeting. at the most the largest reaction from her seems to be the saintly equivalent of a raised vulcan eyebrow.
2.
what is tammarins role in the book?
she doesnt seems to have a role in the book, she acts , mostly as some sort of secretary, and shes only peripherally involved in the story to the degree that i cant really see her purpose to the story, what does she advance in the plot, what is her role? why is she necessary? at the moment she is the equivalent of a sorta pet, a pretty pink vanity item that sits occasionally on toms shoulder. i love her character but i just want to see her more involved even if it is just sitting on his shoulder during important events and meetings and having people/saints react to her presence.3 where is vaselle? i was kinda hoping he’d show up in nysegard, see teragdor again, meet hilda. that seems like it would be a lot of fun for him, and he’d get to demonstrate some warlocky badassery to those ppl who turned him down and on top o that save them and be all arrogantly magnanimous. yeah, that sounds awesome.
It’s more of an allegiance thing for Damien. He can still be a friend, help out, even do research in the library and play unofficial adviser and I am sure will. But you really can’t easily be an official for two different governments, particularly when one half of your first government thinks the second government is a “Force of Evil”
The Nimbus will be very involved in the peace process and there are two parts to its mission: 1) the Orcs/D’Orcs and keeping peace with the elves. Very important; they don’t know for sure yet, what’s up with the Orcs/D’Orcs but they’ve now established contact; so the investigative part is close to over, but the negotiation/keeping the peace is only just starting. 2) The “who is Bess” mission is on hold, I expect that to eventually to come back around as we get moving on the Nyjyr Ennead front
[quote=Puck;5181]When discussing the links being cut from the doomalogues, the word fail is used instead of fall, or perhaps fail safe?[/quote]
Do you mean this sentence?
“He lost contact with Mount Doom, and he was upset that his links didn’t fail over to the Etterdam Doomalogue.”
fail over is what he meant, failing over is the process of falling back to a secondary connection. It is a fail safe mechanism.
A primary system, link, route fails, you fail over to the next in line. It is used very much in IT and the military, but it may not be that common yet in everyday parlance. What do people think
{Gratuitous Plug for Wilds of Eton}
BTW This is why you always want an heir and a spare, in case the line of succession has to fail over to the spare. In which case King works to get a new spare, including, if need be, getting a new wife. BUT you do not want more than an heir and a spare or the family wealth/inheritance becomes a problem, not to mention potential rivalries for succession etc.Now, that being said, the Holy Etonian Emperor is wealthy and powerful enough that he can, and does have a lot of spares. Whereas, Lord Narthan, father of the Emperor’s current wife, HAD a lot of spares, but they keep meeting grisly ends and so he’s got to import a spare from the Emperor (Narthan’s grandson and seventh son of the emperor, Kristof.
I remain firmly against Romance. : I The story is strong without it! Besides, its a problem he doesn’t need : I ugh imagine if Lilith got wind of it.
Chapter 146 would be a good place to put it.
he can be sent back to doom island when tom is updating the 4 demons.he should be at the meeting but in disguise have him in one of those Sauron looking shadow hoods. which hide the face and changes the voice.
Then after the forces of life win he can come back for the victory celebrations.
he can bump in to Teragdor again in another bar. during the next book.[quote=Burien;5182]Everyone else has to suffer the presence of teenage girls, why should your favorite characters be exempt?
Seriously though, Jenn is just lacking a stable, rational adult influence in her life, and she is trying to fill that role. I’d bet if you switched her and Tom he would act very much the same as her in that situation, if maybe a little less hysterical. If every adult around you tells you demons are evil, are you going to believe a demon and a couple of teens you just met, when they tell you they aren’t. Gastrope started coming around after talking to Damien, Jenn didn’t have any such conversation. Maybe when Hilda gets back…[/quote]
Bingo! That’s what I’m going for. Very early on, when I initially thought there might be a chance for Jenn and Tom, her journey was going to be long and difficult however that journey has changed over time, I realized by the end of book 1, she was more compatible with Gastrope’ It’s still not a lock though, matters of the heart cannot be planned for like a battle.
Now, of course, Hilda’s going to have to do a bunch of thinking too. This demon/Orcus thing is new to her as well.
[quote=Puck;5181]Overall, I really like the addition. I’m not sure if its the ending, if so its a bit..abrupt? Also, I still can’t fathom why the book is called The Apostles of Doom.[/quote]
more to come, big battle scene and then for some surprises as we setup the wait for book 4.
Well….how he keeps tabs on them was revealed (to me) via the beta process.
Remember how when we discovered that Orcus’ son was Dis Pater. And remember how it was pointed out that Dis Pater was listed as one of the “Gods of the Grove”
I was, of course, surprised by this (remember I only write down what Tizzy tells me to write) so now my assumption is that Orcus used Dis Pater to keep an eye on them. So this will be a job for Rupert!
Also, the poor forgotten hero Rex died horribly only a few in-story weeks ago, didn’t he? It felt like Jenn was lacking some closure on the whole “why do good people die” thingy that’s the bread and butter of the priesthood.
I wonder how long the El Ohim saint school takes…
[quote=The Author Guy;5202]Note that none of the D’Orcs have been through the Phoenix Cycle yet. They are all less than 100,000 years old.[/quote]
Important (for me o:) ) question: Orcus is/was the son of an god.
God and Pantheons are so old, they did multiple Phoenix Cycles, so they no longer even know, what really happened (see Athena and her birth).So how many Phoenix cycles experienced Orcus/Tom?
Or was this really his first rebirth?If not, why are they all so surprised he is back? Zeus was angry about the Orcus slaying. Why should’nt he make shure, he comes back (especially so that Tartarus gets an warden again)?
Who does even know Orcus is Zeus grandson. The 5S do, do the Alvar god know?
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