The chopping block

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  • #5834
    JMX
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    [quote=MommaGx3;4074][quote=Lhans;3963]

    Table of Contents: Just chop it off. Unnecessary waste of space and just by looking at it, would it really be helpful to the reader? If you must have one at least give per chapter a short descriptive title though this would be like a spoiler. [/quote]

    I can agree with this. It wasn’t much of a concern for me though, I simply ignore TOC.

    [quote=Lhans;3963]Preface: Chop or move to the back.[/quote]

    Agreed. While it was interesting it was dry and somewhat boring. Although, having read it, I did find it come in handy later on in the story. So I do think it is valuable, just not at the front. Though, I did like the timeline.

    [quote=Lhans;3963]Starting from Chapter 121. Chop off Vaselle’s scenes. As for the dimensional gate invention, could probably explain how it came to be when they first used it for some important scene. Didn’t recall any in the book. [/quote]

    WhAAAT???? No No No, I love Vaselle. I was happy to see so much of him. I liked the explanation of the dimensional gate invention. Maybe there was a bit tooo much information that could be simplified or condensed, but I enjoyed actually seeing someone work through the “technology”. So much just “happens” that it was a refreshing perspective.

    [quote=Lhans;3963]Rupert and er company, forgot his name. Could chop off their scenes as well after the shaman meeting. Don’t think we need to learn he won a drinking contest. [/quote]

    I disagree, Rupert and Rog are cute and fun and add another facet to the characters in the story. I would also imagine that Rupert still has quite a part to play in the arc, we don’t want to lose them. However, if we actually saw more of them in relation to Tom, creating a stronger link, I think the parts they have would feel more in place instead of out of place.

    [quote=Lhans;3963]Chop off the too many tea time scenes where so and so were discussing the current events (or at least make em shorter) while they eat/drink something.[/quote]

    As long as it’s not chopping out wine time, I suppose I agree 🙂

    [quote=Lhans;3963]Chop off Damien and other people’s scenes where they don’t really do anything. Like the one where he does a disappearing act before Jenn confronts vaselle. Do we even need Vaselle to meet Teragdor? We could just get rid of the scenes that resulted from that encounter. [/quote]

    Because Jen is so minimal in this story that scene did seem a little odd. But, I felt it necessary to include Damien as his being at the party/battle in 2 was very obvious, we have to have it tied off or at least referenced in 3 for continuity. I personally enjoyed Vaselle and Teragdor meeting. It also leads to possible future information shares 😉

    So, my 2cp so far. In my next read I’ll look for things that seem like they aren’t necessary.

    [/quote]

    I agree that the extra scenes add to the story world. The only gripe I have is it broke up the chapters a lot. It seemed like Some pov would only be two paragraphs. Be nice if there is a way to consolidate the side stories. So there are not quite so many pov changes per chapter. Example Maybe tell all or most of Rupert’s story at one chapter? I don’t know how much that would interfere with the timeline aspect.

    As for th booty call it didn’t seem needed but I felt it added a weird realism to the story. You had two characters doing something that had no driving force for the main story line (unless it’s something that comes up later). So as long as it’s not a word number issue I say leave it in.

    #5836

    Really wish I could get X-Ray to work properly to let people easily look up who’s who.

    Noted all comments, will work on adapting them to some happy medium

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