Beta1 – Bunch of little things

Welcome To Astlan Forums Editing Issues Beta1 – Bunch of little things

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  • #7413
    Iume
    Member

    “All of them!” Talarius grinned. “Or at least all of them that have sworn to uphold the Concord of Conciliation and the Balance.”

    Talarius knows about the Concord and the Balance while Hilda nd Stevos had to be reminded? Did Stainberry teach him? Easiest to just swap Talarius for one of the D’Orc.

    WHACK SMASH [color=red]went his glancing[/color] off a ghoul’s head this time. –> [color=red]went his mace glancing[/color]

    Ghouls were infected, [color=red]disease mortal[/color]; –> Ghouls were infected, disease[color=red]d[/color] mortal[color=red]s[/color];

    Within a matter of moments all of the runes flashed brightly and the space within the archway flashed with bright atunlight.

    Overuse of flashed. Reword to: Within a matter of moments all of the runes flashed brightly and [color=red]bright atunlight poured through the gateway.[/color]

    #7415

    [quote=Iume;5703]plane, not plain unless we’re grassland.[/quote]

    He was saying plain as in very large field, it has 125,000+ people, some of who are quite large on it. But can change that to region.

    #7416

    [quote=Iume;5706]Talarius knows about the Concord and the Balance while Hilda nd Stevos had to be reminded?Did Stainberry teach him?Easiest to just swap Talarius for one of the D’Orc.[/quote]

    Good point, unless it was discussed in the Abyss, say in book 2? This is the sort of stuff that Antefalken was talking about. He would know about it because he hung out at the Courts with Lilith a lot.

    #7417

    [quote=Iume;5706]Overuse of flashed.Reword to:Within a matter of moments all of the runes flashed brightly and bright atunlight poured through the gateway.[/quote]

    [color=blue]This was the second surprise runic gateway activation she’d had in a week! Within a matter of moments all of the runes flashed brightly and midday atunlight poured through the gateway.[/color]

    #7418

    [quote=LCSpartan051;5708]Also, why to the Lich’s want to know what an Apostle is? They are trying to re-create the Dark Apostle’s work, so they should know what the title means.[/quote]

    I am sorry where is this at? That they asked what an apostle is?

    #7420

    Found it: Here is corrected version.

    [color=blue]“Is an Apostle of the Five Siblings similar to the Dark Apostle?” Baba Smert’ hissed.

    “Not typically that powerful. It is a rank that is higher than a High Pontificate, but a bit lower than a prophet. Technically, prophets are often saints who were apostles when mortal.” Exador said squinting, “I would argue that the Dark Apostle was most similar to a prophet; however, their methods of ascension to power are quite different.”
    [/color]

    #7421
    LCSpartan051
    Member

    That had been irritating me for like 3 updates.

    #7422
    Iume
    Member

    Remove this line: [color=red]Teragdor shook his head in surprise, apparently, they had forgotten to tell Iskerus that the demon who had kidnapped Talarius was the reborn demon prince, Orcus.[/color]

    Teragdor did in fact tell Iskerus that the demon that took Talarius was suspected to be Orcus.

    [quote]
    Iskerus once more found himself staring incredulously at the half-orc. “The Greater Demon’s forces? So he is actually, as we suspected, not a Greater Demon, but one of the Arch-Demons that were infesting Freehold?”

    Teragdor shook his head. “Nothing that simple. We have fairly good evidence that the demon that stole our lord’s mana and abducted Talarius is the Lord of Doom.”

    “Lord of Doom?” Iskerus asked. That did not sound at all auspicious.

    “More precisely, the new, or perhaps returning, Lord of Mount Doom in the Abyss, the Prince of the Dead, God of the Underworld, Punisher of Broken Oaths, the long thought Dead God of the Orcs. In short, he is either the Demon Prince Orcus, or his heir. Whichever it is, he has the Wand of Orcus, has reawakened Mount Doom and commands an army of Demonic Orcs.”
    [/quote]

    #7423

    [quote=Iume;5743]Remove this line:Teragdor shook his head in surprise, apparently, they had forgotten to tell Iskerus that the demon who had kidnapped Talarius was the reborn demon prince, Orcus.[/quote]

    [color=blue]Teragdor shook his head in surprise, he had personally told Iskerus that they suspected that the demon that had taken Talarius was Orcus. So that was a little awkward, Teragdor thought to himself. However, to be fair, Teragdor did not see the demon that had captured Talarius. There were two D’Orcs, a second knight and the wizard. [/color]

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